“There are a lot of stupid products in the world,” you may find yourself muttering. “Has Matthew tried them, so I don’t have to?”
**Batter Blaster** is pancake and waffle batter in an aerosol can. And it’s organic! When I brought it home, I said, “Did anybody order…BATTER BLASTER?”
“No,” said Laurie.
“What is Batter Blaster?” asked Iris.
“It’s pancake batter in a can,” I replied.
“That doesn’t sound good,” she said. “Well, maybe good.”
The joke was sure on them. I think Batter Blaster is great. It makes light, crepelike pancakes. Maybe a touch too sweet, but the texture is airy and crisp. The cost is absurd, of course: $5 for approximately 28 pancakes. I added frozen wild blueberries, which was a good move. If you try it, be sure to heed the warning of Amanda Clarke, writing for Serious Eats:
> Using conventional indicators for flippage as my guide (this was my instinct, but it was also in line with the Batter Blaster website recommendations), I had some difficulty in making pancakes that were much to look at. For, when large bubbles began to rise and pop out of the slightly puffed batter and the surface began to look a bit dry, the pancake was invariably not set enough to flip or even check for flipping without some carnage.
**The Baconator** is not new–Wendy’s introduced it a year ago–but I had my first encounter with it this week. (We stopped on our way home from IKEA. I think Wendy’s + IKEA constitutes the American dream right there.)
What impressed me most about the Baconator was not the six slices of bacon sitting atop the two beef patties and cheese slices. No, it was the fact that by default it comes with NO VEGETABLES. This is the land of meat and honey, baby! In a recent 5-4 decision the Supreme Court found that American citizens cannot be tried in military tribunals, *unless they request lettuce on the Baconator.*
I ate about two-thirds of the Baconator before getting full and bored.
Rating: Baconator, not recommended. IKEA Ivar shelving, recommended.
Any stupid products you’d like me to try?
I don’t think the cost is that absurd, considering you get like 2 pancakes for $5 at a restaurant. And you don’t even get to squirt things out of a can!
I think you need a vacatation Matt…..
Yeah, Laurel, I was speculating about an industrial version of the Batter Blaster that would be mounted above a commercial griddle and electronically dispense precise amounts of batter in a tightly packed patter.
Actually, I guess that’s probably how they make those frozen toaster pancakes.
ooh, try these
markm, if he brings those things home I’m leaving and coming to live with YOU.
Sonic used to have the “pancake on a stick” thing without the chocolate chips. Actually quite good.
And yes, I realize I’ve just destroyed any credibility I may have had as a pastry chef.
Neil, if you put that on the menu, I will come into Canlis so often you’ll have to give me one of those etched glasses.
We must be on the same novelty food schedule. I picked up a Batter Blaster for a camping trip this weekend. The super-light texture made it pretty tricky to make good looking pancakes over a campfire with rudimentary tools….but it was sure awesome!!!!
Not to mention the fact that they were cooked in Bacon fat.
The name makes me want to mount one on each hand like Spiderman. Pssshhhttt! Take that Bad-guy! Pancake in your face!
Has anybody tried it in a waffle iron yet?
I tried the waffles. Not nearly as good as the pancakes. They were kind of tough.
There is a stupid product I buy every time we visit the Olympia Farmer’s Market – Meat Trail Mix.
One of the vendors sells a blend of jerky, sausage and cheese, by the pound, all in bite sized hunks.
There is no excuse for it. Also no resistance.
I dont really want you to try this, I just like sharing how I found out about it.
I was driving down the freeway heading out of Vancouver when a generic minivan passed by. The vans rear window was completely filled with plain block-letter signage which read:
REVOLUTIONARY COOKING DEVICE
Moments like that transcend words (because youre laughing too hard to talk).
Edit: grr autoformatting. adding the http:// automatically gives it a level of sophistication which completely ruins the picture.
isn’t the quote reference “the land of milk and honey”?
but i like “the land of meat and honey,” too.
“I was speculating about an industrial version of the Batter Blaster that would be mounted above a commercial griddle and electronically dispense precise amounts of batter in a tightly packed patter.”
Here ya go! http://www.orbie.com/
Can you read that as anything other than “complete donut turkey packages?” I can’t.
I followed a link here from Orangette, and as a law student, you’ve already won me over as a reader with this line:
“In a recent 5-4 decision the Supreme Court found that American citizens cannot be tried in military tribunals, unless they request lettuce on the Baconator.”
Those ivar shelves are damn handy.
Btw, have you ever considered filling those pancakes with savory foodstuff?