Say you took a typical fast-food burger place like McDonald’s and gave the menu an extreme makeover. Oh, nothing fancy. Replace the meat with humanely raised, antibiotic-free, local beef. Instead of American cheese slices, Tillamook cheddar. Instead of Mystery Hake for the fish and chips, Alaskan halibut. Fresh local berries for the milkshakes. Salads made with world-class local cheese. No trans fats in the fry oil (lard or peanut would be ideal, but canola is okay). Oh, and you can’t raise prices.
Yeah, it’s real, but only in Oregon and southwest Washington. [Burgerville](http://www.burgerville.com/) is one of the best reasons to drive through the area. I really hate long car rides, and when it’s time for a trip to Portland, I usually grumble about it, but Laurie can always entice me by saying, “We could stop at Burgerville.”
Last week I managed two trips to Burgerville. First I had a grilled Walla Walla onion burger and a Mocha Perk, a chocolate-coffee shake that is no Black Tiger but is still smooth and terrific. (There’s also a chocolate-hazelnut shake.) Laurie had a salad with Rogue Creamery Smokey Blue Cheese. Rogue’s cheese is in the same league as the best moldy cheeses in the world, and here it was at a burger joint. (Yes, to answer your next question, you can add it to your burger, for an extra $2.) The next day, at the Portland Farmers Market, we bought some more Smokey Blue from the Rogue Creamery stand.
Next time in I had a burger with pepper bacon and Tillamook cheddar, and I tried the Walla Walla onion rings. These were unfortunately not so good. They’re greasy, the coating peels easily, and they’re made with absurdly thick slices of onion. It was the last weekend for fresh raspberries; blackberry shakes are up now. In the fall, it’s huckleberry or pumpkin shakes, and sweet potato fries, which are awesome, although it would be great if there were a way to make sweet potato fries crispy. Preferably without using batter.
Burgerville isn’t even any more expensive than McDonald’s for most items. And aside from the food, it’s just like any other fast-food restaurant, so the kids won’t think you’re taking them someplace weird.
yum. Now why don’t they have a place like that up in Seattle?
I can’t believe I lived in Salem for two years and never went! We’re headed to Portland in a couple of weeks. I think a grilled Walla Walla onion burger and a blackberry shake are in my future. Of course if I was good, like Laurie, I’d have a salad!
I don’t want to give the impression that Laurie is a salad person. She was after the cheese.
Not to mention the bug-trapping-ball-scissors they were giving out as a kid’s meal toy.
at the end of june, we were in eugene for a wedding…my FIRST EVER trip to oregon! wooo! (who KNEW it ever got to be 97 stinkin’ degrees in oregon?? at least i didn’t have to wear a rented navy blue suit…like my poor sweaty husband…)
anyway, the day after the wedding, we drove back to fly out of portland, and on the way, we dropped off our friend josh, who was going to stay with friends…
josh, 29, a round-shouldered man of slight stature, very chicago, very nebbishy, and one of the best jazz trumpeters alive, on his cell in the back seat, trying to arrange a drop zone:
“where should we meet you? burger bowl? burger town. burger…bowl. it’s a “v”? burger VOLE? vurger bole? oh. burgerville.”
and that is how i accidentally had the best-ever fast food fish. at burger vole.
Hee hee, burger vole. In college, my friend Kenji ran an absurdist presidential campaign with running mates Vole and Nacho Cheese.
Rob, that bug thing was awesome. I need one.